I’ve been trying to put all the pieces of some distant dream together for awhile now, wanting everything to be clear and tailored and official. But so it seems I’m really just stalling – stalling on a dream and stalling on a need as fear, insecurities, and lies all tactfully creep in. What’s becoming clearer and clearer to me is the more I wait to get started, the more wasteful it all becomes. In this so-called time of “preparation” for dreams to become realities my soul still longs for deeper purpose and joy and the world continues to roll on in the very hard way it does sometimes. And after hearing one too many stories these past few months of brokenness, I’m over it.
Enough is enough now.
The Lord has been good to show me quite clearly that there is a need to share my story. Most importantly, there is a need to share the real and sometimes raw side of life that doesn’t get much play on our social media feeds. When I’m in the pit, I’ve absolutely found hope in the stories shared from people who are also in the pit or who have been there before. It’s not negativity for negativity’s sake. It’s real actual life for hope’s sake. One of the most detrimental lies we can feed into is the one that says I’m the only one out there who struggles. When we refuse to get really transparent we fuel a lot of wrong fires in our own soul and in our circles. People are empowered to believe (really believe) in hope and truth and renewal as they see others experience all that beauty from ashes.
My purpose in sharing and writing is to bring courage through vulnerability – to say goodbye to “I’m fine” and “things are great” when they’re actually not. And ultimately, to remind myself and to remind you that the deeper the pain, the greater the glory. Every story is God’s bigger story of grace and of redemption. When we hide ourselves or sit on our stories we can’t experience grace and that’s a big deal to me.
So, I hope you’ll stick around. I hope you’ll laugh and cry and nod your head in solidarity as you read.
Hang on and keep going friend. You are absolutely not alone.